Sunday, 3 February 2013

{issue 2} Coffee & Conversation

I don't have a typically stressful life.  My schedule is rarely jam packed, I make a lot of time for myself, I have a lot of freedom to do things I love, and I try very hard to get away often, whether it just back up to the cabin, a whirlwind trip to NYC, or a spur of the moment trip to Florida for almost a month (3 days notice was almost not enough).

However, while I may not have to get up and commute to the office every day, chase kids around and worry about dinner for the family all at once (I dunno how you guys do it), I still have a few stresses.

Some would call a heartbreaking divorce a bit stressful. Personally, it's the after effects of my husband cheating, stalking, and threatening to kill me that I find exceptionally stressful.  Triple checking doors and windows, wondering what will happen when the restraining order expires, and of course, the lovely Facebook "friend suggestions" that usually include one of his many girlfriends really take the wind out of my sails.  Not to mention laying in bed on a sleepless night, wondering what the fuck that noise outside is.  Starting life over in general is stressful.

Plus, if I'm not having an uncontrollable and unrealistic panic attack in a parking lot because I'm lost (happens fairly often), I'm worrying.  I'm a worrier.  I worry constantly.  About everything.  Did I lock the door?  Did my dogs get out?  Is the apartment on fire?  Is my car breaking down as I think this?  Did I remember everything I need?

There's a professional term for me, other than crazy, but we don;t need to get into that here and now.  Unless you have whiskey and time to spare.  Do you have whiskey?

What I want to know is this - what do you do to de-stress?  What's your go to method to relax after a jam packed, stressful day?  How do you handle a panic attack, if you have them and it's gotten to that point?

Books help me relax.   If I'm on the verge of freaking the fuck out, shutting out the world for even just a chapter helps immensely.  If I'm already past the breaking point, and am sitting in my car crying through an anxiety attack, I force myself to think of the things I'm thankful for, and say them out loud.  It doesn't work instantly, but after a few sentences, it gives me enough distraction to gain a bit of control and edge some calmness in.

"I'm thankful I'm not married to a jackass anymore.  I'm thankful I'm not on the corner, selling myself for rent.  I'm thankful for Starbucks.  I'm thankful for comfortable underwear.  I'm thankful my car ISN'T breaking down right this minute.  "

Whatever it takes.


  1. Hey, again ;)

    You never got back to me but that's alright ;) I still like your blog, so sometimes I still drop by..
    Books, weed, physical work in the garden, caring for my son and other animals help me relax.
    Greetings from Belgium,

  2. Total alone time for myself. Music. Books. Something I can get lost in for a little while.
    Anything that helps the sore bits of my life that still chafe so it's bearable.

    Cigarettes. Video games. Anything I can use as a buffer between myself and what hurts.