{Fixing Yourself update} Just One Thing

I had a bad day last week.  I have a lot of bad days, to be honest - starting life over again after divorce is exhausting - but one day in particular was exceptionally hard.

Of course, that's the day I headed to the bookstore.  The bookstore and library are usually my sanctuary, the place I go to breathe deeply, relax, and take a step away from anything that's going on in the world outside.  I find that when I'm teetering on the edge of major anxiety attacks, this is the one place that will keep me grounded (other than a small town pub with a live band and a lot of alcohol, of course).

"This is fucking perfect, " I panted, leaning on the shelf in the 'Well Being' section in the throes of a major panic attack, attempting to calm myself down before I drew too much attention.

Don't mind me, just another woman having a break down in front of You Can Fix Your Life by Dr. Phil.  The irony is not lost on me.

I eventually managed to pull myself together, locate this months Fixing Yourself (Without Whiskey) title, and scurry back to my car.

Moral of the story?  The timing for me to read a "Self Help" book is dead on.

My first impression of Just One Thing: Developing A Buddha Brain One Simple Practice at a Time by Rick Hanson is pretty simple - it's a small, easy to read book.  It's broken down into 52 mind exercises, which I'm reading two or three of a day.  Well, that's the plan, anyway - so far I've accomplished reading only one a day.

The first part is about being good to yourself.  I kind of thought drinking myself to oblivion was being good to myself, but whatevs.  I've read the first four practices thus far, and so far I've learned the following:

1.  I'm not my own friend, most of the time.  After reading the section on this, it's made me aware of how much of a shitty friend I am to myself.  So now I'm aware of it, but that's it.  I think that makes me an even shittier friend to myself.

2.  Take a few seconds to enjoy the feeling of the small good things - this is a fantastic premise, and one I agree with.  Then the author spurted off some lame and corny analogies, like ".. a warm glow spreading through the chest like the warmth of a cup of hot cocoa on a cold wintery day.  "

Right.  Eyes rolled.

3.  Compassion to yourself - acknowledge difficulties, challenges and suffering.  Again, fantastic.  I'm kick ass for leaving a man that didn't value me enough to respect me.  Right?  But yet again, off we go with the laaaaaaaaame sentences like ".. visualize a light radiating from you, maybe from your heart.  "

Eyes rolled, whiskey poured.

4.  Relax.  Breathe.  breathing exercises.  deep breaths.  The usual.

So far, I'm not feeling very fixed.  I'm feeling like I need a drink.

Or five.

Fixing Yourself Without Whiskey #1 - Just One Thing

Well, you voted.  I'm actually a little surprised how the votes turned out - you guys chose such a NORMAL book for me!  And might I say, an easy one?  Do I have to tame my inner bitch for the good of the world?  No (I think I just heard my neighbours sigh).  Do I need to Add More Ing, while not knowing what the fuck "Ing" is?  No.  All I gots to do is think some zen, Buddha-like thoughts.

Piece O' Cake, my lovelies.

"This book offers simple brain-training practices you can do every day to protect against stress, lift your mood, and find greater emotional resilience.  "

It's like you guys are telling me I need to cheer the fuck up.

This book is meant to be read in a few different ways - it's broken into 52 "simple" practices that the reader can either do by sections, or once a week, etc.

I like to go against the grain and am a big fan of instant gratification, so I'll be doing things a bit differently.  I'll read one practice a day (sometimes two), and each week will do a quickish summary.  At the end of the month, I'll roll all of my experiences into one general review.  Namely, did the book have an effect on this cynical redhead, or did I pass out mid-enlightenment in a whiskey haze?

Only time will tell.