{review} The Lucky One - Nicholas Sparks

Oh, Nicholas Sparks.  You confuse me so much.  When I read The Notebook, I fell in love.  And when I read A Walk to Remember, I promptly kicked you to the curb.  I'm very fickle like that, you see.  My dad used to say I had a 'Catch & Release' attitude towards men (15 years later, still trying to figure out if he meant to make me sound slutty or not), and it was no different with you.  You had my heart, and then you got entirely too sappy.  Even back then, I was too cynical for sappy.

You tried to redeem yourself with Nights in Rodanthe, but I made it pretty clear that I never wanted to see you again.  I've avoided you like the plague ever since.  One good moment does not a relationship make (trust me, I married my one good moment man).  I made snarky comments about you.  I called you boring and predictable.  I also called you a few other names, but you're probably getting the gist of it - I was a bitch to you, and enjoyed it.

Then my new book club forced me to see you again.  Forced me to stand in the bookstore and actually ask the staff to go get you from the box in the back.  I put off reading The Lucky One as long as possible, and finally had to give in and spend time with you again.

Here's the thing, Mr. Sparks - I can't figure out why I enjoyed The Lucky One so much.  The premise itself was a little too out there for me (yes, this is coming from a lover of all things zombie & apocalypse - what does that tell you?) and the characters a little too transparent.  A man walks across the country (literally) to maybe locate a woman in a photo that had been his good luck charm while overseas?  I don't see that as romantic, I see it as a little stalker-ish.

Of course, as soon as he finds her, she's a guarded woman with a difficult life.  Does she let her walls down for him?  Do they fall in love?

You're Nicholas Sparks.  Of course they do.  I saw the ending coming before I even started the book, but what I didn't see coming was my attachment to the transparent and emotional characters, or my enjoyment of this damn book overall.

Please, Nicholas, please forgive me.  I was bitchy and moody and down right mean, and I'm sorry.  I promise I'll make it up to you, just don't leave me again, okay?  I'll be different this time.  We'll be different this time.  I'll try so hard.  We can make this work, I know we can.

But if I read another snooze fest or see another movie of yours featuring annoying "actress/singers" like Mandy & Miley, I'm out.  Once a fickle bitch, always a fickle bitch.